With us all soon breaking for our Christmas break, I wanted to share my take on being authentic during the Christmas Party season. However, before I start, I wanted to share with you an extract from an article from a couple of years ago by Professor Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic, which challenges the common view on authentic leadership; he says, “…the actual reality is this: in any important life situation or event, people are not rewarded for behaving in a spontaneous, uninhibited or unfiltered way – but rather, for putting on the right repertoire of behaviours, managing impressions and conforming to the dominant social norms and etiquette.” I find it interesting; in fact, it’s not about being our authentic selves; it’s more about adjusting our behaviours to adhere to the expectations others have of us. I find that fascinating; what are your thoughts on that? He argues that although we’re constantly being told to be “true to yourself” or to “just be yourself” and to “stop worrying what people think”. The critical ingredients that make an effective leader are the opposite of that. He gives examples such as controlling emotional outbursts, exercising self-control, caring more about others than yourself, making an effort to understand other’s perspectives, and being aware of your reputation to harness it, finesse it, and curate it. What is lost as a leader if you learn to be more aware of how others perceive you? Those who can apply this more consistently are deemed better to deal with and more effective as leaders; who’d have thought, eh!
As I describe my five points below, consider the professor’s comments as my frame of reference.
- Beyond the Festive Façade
Don’t be that leader who’s usually reserved, who suddenly is King of the dancefloor, or, conversely, the leader who’s always enthusiastic and now becomes a wallflower. These shifts can be telling. You need to be the same person at the party as you are typically with your team – consistent, with good intent, and approachable.
- The Heart of Leadership
If there’s one thing your team want more than a Secret Santa gift, it’s to be able to trust you. They believe you have their best interests at heart, and your intent towards them is always pure, which builds trust. When they see your behaviour as being consistent at the party, as when they were talking over budgets, it lays a foundation of trust, which is the cornerstone of a successful team.
- The Best Gift You Can Give
Remember what we’ve said: authenticity is more valuable to your team than anything else. Being authentic and genuine towards them is priceless – whether you’re telling jokes (appropriate ones, of course) or discussing strategy, it all encourages a culture of openness and collaboration. They want to see you more than just at Christmas.
- The Spirit of Togetherness
I love the Christmas period because of the sense of togetherness, which should also be remembered at the Christmas party. As a leader, make sure everyone feels part of the celebrations.
Just like those dinner parties where you bring your own dish to create a feast, recognising, appreciating and valuing the diversity of your team will only aid in enriching your workplace.
- Carrying the Cheer Throughout the Year
After the festive period, don’t leave the spirit of authenticity and good intent behind. Embrace the approach in your daily leadership style.
Be that leader who’s as approachable in January – June as you were at the Christmas party. Make this approach constant rather than episodic.
Remember, your behaviour at the office party can reflect the kind of leader you truly are. Be your ‘authentic’ self; this will brighten up the Christmas period and impact their trust levels in you all year round.